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At one point, my boyfriend put a foot over my vagina to stop people entering me without a condom. Recalling one orgy with at least 10 men and women and several onlookers, Jenny says: 'I remember a mass of bodies and hands touching me all over the place.
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'If we had the chance to go to sex clubs all day, we would,' she admits, saying the only obstacle is childcare for her young daughter from a previous relationship. I thought it was beautiful.'Īt the height of their addiction, Jenny and her boyfriend were spending four nights a week at sex clubs and have spent close to £2,000 over the last year on entry charges alone. 'When I walked in the door, I saw a woman lying on a table with six different men wanking over her body while she gave someone a blow job. 'The first time I went I was a bit nervous,' Jenny admits. Just two weeks after their first date, however, her partner relapsed and it wasn't long before the pair became regulars on the local sex club scene. When Jenny met her boyfriend last year, he was almost six months into a celibacy agreement with a counsellor treating him for sex addiction. But it wasn't until the 31-year-old met her current partner that she thinks her sex addiction finally came to fruition. However, soon after her mother's death, Jenny's father turned to prostitutes to the numb his own pain, regularly inviting strippers to family dinners ('he was aged 72 and they were in their 20s') and at one point he was seeing her 19-year-old best friend Abbie*.Īs a result, Jenny is convinced her father desensitised her to sex. 'I lost my mother at the age of nine, my godmother, two uncles and all my godparents in the years to follow. In Jenny's case, she attributes her addiction and inability to attach emotional value to sex to losing several family members at an early age. From then on, I got into a routine of using my vibrator at least five or six times a day.' When I did for the first time, it felt amazing.
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'I remember locking myself in my room one day, lying down on my bed, and being determined to make myself cum. The root of the problemĬonvinced she was abnormal for her inability to orgasm, Jenny bought her first vibrator at the age of 17. 'Some doctors don't think it exists because applying medical terminology such as the word 'addiction' to a normal behaviour like sex may pathologise it,' reveals Peter Saddington, a clinical supervisor for Relate. Rather, it is currently regarded as a chronic brain or borderline personality disorder. However - unlike alcohol, smoking or drugs - sex addiction (or 'hypersexuality' as it's otherwise known) is a contentious issue that is yet to be recognised by the medical and clinical community as a psychological compulsion. While the causes are yet unknown, sex addiction is widely believed to derive from childhood or adolescence, often resulting from an early emotional or physical trauma, sexual abuse, neglect or depression.Īccording to relationship counselling service Relate, sex addiction can be described as any sexual activity that feels 'out of control' and involves frequent self-destructive or high-risk activity that isn't 'emotionally fulfilling, that one is ashamed of and that one is unable to stop, despite it causing repeated problems'.įor some addicts, as in Jenny's case, sexual compulsions can come at any moment and is commonly thought to be a way of anaesthetising or coping with negative thoughts and emotions. 'There are moments when I get really horny and if I don't do anything about it I just go crazy,' she explains. It gave me a thrill.' Addiction or behavioural disorder?ĭid Jenny have a problem? Despite the above anecdote providing what one assumes is ample evidence, it took her a while to come to terms with the fact that she did, in fact, have a sex addiction. 'Rather than going to the toilet, I liked the fact people could've caught me at any second. 'If I hadn't masturbated at that moment, I don't know what I'd have done,' she tells ELLE UK. It took approximately 10 minutes for her to orgasm. Surrounded by her colleagues - one was sat less than two metres away - the then 29-year-old slowly slid her right hand up her skirt, down the front of her tights and gently began rubbing her clitoris. Jenny's* boss had just left the office to grab lunch when she felt the overwhelming urge to start touching herself.